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( Why The Honestly Virtuous CHARLES-IN-CHARGE Played By SCOTT BAIO Has Become A More Genuinely Beloved And Fondly Remembered 1980s Family Sitcom Hero Than MICHAEL J. FOX’s Deceptive And Fake Liberal Stereotype Of A Conservative Youth Alex P. Keaton From FAMILY TIES )
As creator Gary David Goldberg describes, FAMILY TIES riffed on the angst of the 1960s generation at the Reagan Revolution. It also reinforced the nascent yuppie upset so evident in shows like “Cheers” and later, “thirtysomething”, questioning how the rebels of the 1960s could preserve their radical values while becoming bourgeois parents and business owners benefiting from the capitalist system.
But FAMILY TIES wasn’t designated to be an evenhanded riff on Reagan era politics or even 1960s Liberal angst. It was designed to target Conservatives. ALEX P. KEATON ( Michael J. Fox ) was the stand-in for Conservatives. He was brilliant and witty and serious-minded. And totally amoral, Gordon Gecko at age seventeen. The whole point of the show was that ALEX WAS ALWAYS WRONG. Only the panache of Michael J. Fox made ALEX palatable.
“The interesting thing with ALEX, and to the same extent with Archie Bunker ( from ‘All In The Family’ ), and if you go back to Norman Lear and ask him, he’d say he did not think he was creating a sympathetic character,” said Goldberg. “But all the sympathy went to Archie. It was crazy. With ALEX, I did not think I was creating a sympathetic character. Those were not traits that I aspired to and didn’t want my kids to aspire to, actually. But at the end of FAMILY TIES, when we went off the air, The New York Times had done a piece and they said, ‘Greed with the Face of an Angel’. And I think that’s true. Michael J. Fox could make things work. The audience would simply not access the darker side of what he’s actually saying.“
A few examples. After being told in season 3 by his younger, innocent sister that there’s more to life than just getting rich and that “people who need people are the luckiest people in the world“, ALEX replies, “Jennifer, people who have money don’t need people.” Another season 3 episode has ALEX telling his pregnant mother that she shouldn’t fly. “Alex, you know, if you had it your way, Mom would be locked in her room for nine months wearing a veil,” sister Mallory snipes. “Oh come on, that’s not true” says Alex. “I see no need for a veil.” ALEX is constantly putting his foot in his mouth this way, ironically poking fun at and caricaturing conservative positions - and he gets a laugh because he’s so charming.
In fact, ALEX became so much of a hero that even Liberals didn’t understand when he lost battles. “Steven Spielberg was a a huge fan,” Goldberg recalled, “Used to come to all the tapings and was a close friend and he’d come on Friday nights. One night, we did a show where ALEX lies to this girl and completely disses the Equal Rights Amendment and everything it stands for and pretends to be a feminist. At the end, she tells him off. So after, Steven comes over and I said, “How did you like the show?” He said, “Well, it’s all right.” And I said, “What’s wrong?” And he said, “ALEX didn’t get the girl.“ And I said, “Yeah, but he lied and cheated.” And he said, “But it’s ALEX, you want him to win at the end.“
But ALEX RARELY WON, because Goldberg and the writers’ room didn’t want him to win. In fact, Goldberg said, “We actually had this structure that we inherited from Jim Brooks and Allan Burns, which was six scenes and a tag. And then THE LAST SCENE BECAME ALEX APOLOGIZES IN EVERY SHOW. We just left it up there. ALEX APOLOGIZES. Some version of it.
For example, in the season 1 episode “The Fifth Wheel”, ALEX is supposed to babysit younger sister Jennifer. As always, his desire for cash gets the better of him. He decides to take Jennifer with him to a poker game, justifying his actions with an appeal to pseudo-conservative masculinity. “In this industrial society of ours, there aren’t a lot of battles for a man to fight. There aren’t a lot of opportunities to go one-on-one with another man. There aren’t a lot of tests of one’s courage and stamina. Do you know what I mean?” he says.
Naturally, things get out of hand - Jennifer walks out of the game and get lost. Later, she shows up at home after taking the bus. ALEX gets into trouble, then promises his parents that he’ll take better care of Jennifer from now on: “Yeah, we’ll keep her happy, we’ll make sure she gets out every now and then, we’ll feed her and keep her clean.” Finally, HE APOLOGIZES, baming his own self-centeredness and his lack of sensitivity. This is a more subtle episode than some of the earlier ones, but it is just as effective: money is the root of all evil and ALEX is the greedy Reaganite who loses the child.
This show format, repeated over and over again – ALEX HAS A CONSERVATIVE / GREEDY IDEA, ALEX SCREWS SOMETHING UP, ALEX APOLOGIZES – exposes just what Goldberg and the 1960s era creators thought of the Reagan generation. The show always ends with ALEX needing to be reaccepted into the family, after attempting to individuate, to be himself. THE LIBERAL ASSUMPTION IS THAT ALEX’S POLITICAL CHOICES ARE MERELY TEENAGE REBELLION AND THAT REUNIFICATION WILL INEVITABLY OCCUR ONCE ALEX COMES TO HIS SENSES. For that reunification to occur, however, ALEX must subordinate his principles - which aren’t true principles but greed manifest in a false facade of principles - to his need for communion with his family.
Goldberg makes that clear in the pilot episode. In that episode, ALEX wants to go out with a hot, blonde, rich cheerleader-type named Kimberly. She takes him to a “restricted” country club - it bans blacks, Hispanics, Jews and anyone who didn’t “come over on the Mayflower”, as Elyse puts it. Steven stands up against ALEX but ALEX goes anyway. Later, Steven shows up at the country club, humiliating ALEX. ALEX reams Steven when he gets home. “I was wrong to go over there like that,” says Steven, “but I hope you understand why I felt so strongly about your being at a restricted club.” “I do, Dad,” replies ALEX, “but I’m seventeen years old. When I see Kimberly Blanton in a strapless evening gown, I don’t look past her for the Bill of Rights.”
“I was seventeen myself once,” answers Steven. ”But I had principles. I had beliefs.” The pattern is set: ALEX, despite all his talk of principle, is unprincipled. His parents Steven and Elyse are the principled heroes of the piece. ALEX’S REBELLION IS SIMPLE FREUDIAN PSYCHODRAMA. ( By contrast, Meathead’s rebellion in “All In The Family” is principled opposition to Conservative bigotry. ) What Goldberg did not expect, of course, is that by allowing ALEX to mock liberal values, he was unwittingly undermining them.
Goldberg made no bones about the fact that he INFUSED POLITICS INTO THE SHOW - but he learned early on that he couldn’t simply do it in Norman Lear’s obvious fashion. “That’s a tension ( between messaging and entertainment ) we welcomed. What you can’t do is ‘a very special episode of ‘ where you do the show and there’s no jokes. The shows we did earlier in the season were the ones we buried, because I was completely wrong about what I thought the show was going to be: nuclear war, gun control, climate change, death. And so you had to put it in a different package. It had to come out in a different way.”
And FAMILY TIES did do it in a different way. There were episodes about nuclear war - one in particular in which ALEX learns to get along with a Russian kid at a chess tournament - and episodes about sex and episodes about The Evils Of Capitalism. But they were covered over in a brilliant display of hilarity. It’s no wonder that Ronald Reagan said that FAMILY TIES was his favorite show.
Like ”Cheers”, FAMILY TIES was a slow starter out of the gate but the network stuck with it. And like ”Cheers”, it eventually became a massive hit when it was placed behind ”The Cosby Show” in 1984, running for seven seasons.
Gary David Goldberg’s other big show came years later when he brought back Michael J. Fox for SPIN CITY. Goldberg wrote the show with partner Bill Lawrence ( who would go on to create ”Scrubs” ). That show cast Fox as the deputy mayor of New York, and was even more political than FAMILY TIES. Fox was still playing Alex Keaton, but this time Keaton was grown up and a Democrat. He was just as Machiavellian, just as manipulative, but this time, he was good-heartedly trying to ram through The Liberal Agenda.
I asked Goldberg why there didn’t seem to be any real debate about politics on television anymore - why everyone simply assumed that the far-left position was correct, and that the only real question was whether that position was practical. At least in ”All In The Family”, I said, the Conservative position was articulated, however badly, and then knocked down. Modern television doesn’t even bother articulating the Conservative position.
“If I was writing now, I wouldn’t be having those debates either,” Goldberg said. “Because I think it’s great we’ve moved beyond that.” That’s certainly arguable - we’re still debating Gay Marriage, the morality of which SPIN CITY took for granted. But if we’ve begun to move beyond such debates, it’s due in large part to the success of writers like Gary David Goldberg, who have made The Leftist Position so palatable to a broad swath of Americans simply by presenting likable characters who promote Liberal Politics as tautologies.
( “Family Ties, 1982 - 1989 : Reagan’s Children Of The Corn” pp. 124 - 129, “PRIMETIME PROPAGANDA - The True Hollywood Story Of How The Left Took Over Your TV” by Ben Shapiro, Broadside Books : 2011 )
The Winner : SCOTT BAIO as CHARLES-IN-CHARGE!
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How Charles In Charge and Patrick Bateman in American Psycho are The Cain and Abel of The Reagan Decade
1. SCOTT BAIO is Charles, an excellent scholar and a nice, caring big brother in CHARLES-IN-CHARGE.
CHRISTIAN BALE is Patrick Bateman, an executive serial killer and a knife-carving bloody butcher in AMERICAN PSYCHO.
2. Commander Walter Powell ( James Callahan ) keeps a vigilant eye on Charles who has to balance his double responsibilities as a college student and a male nanny for the Powell grandchildren.
Police Detective Donald Kimball ( Willem Dafoe ) keeps a vigilant eye on Patrick Bateman who has to balance his double life as a corporate stockbroker and a mass murderer of party-going urban citizens.
3. Jamie ( Nicole Eggert ) is the vain, materialistic and status-conscious high school cheerleading eldest granddaughter of the Powell family whom Charles must look after.
Evelyn ( Reese Witherspoon ) is the vain, materialistic and status-conscious high society patrician fiancee of Patrick Bateman whom he must provide for.
4. Sarah ( Josie Davis ) is the shy, empathetic and bright second granddaughter of the Powell family whom Charles helps through her awkward teenage years.
Jean ( Chloe Sevigny ) is the shy, empathetic and bright secretary of Patrick Bateman whom she helps in his various routine corporate duties.
5. Adam ( Alexander Polinsky ) is the naive and impressionable young grandson of the Powell family who looks up to Charles as an admirable role model deserving of emulation but still hides in the closet for the purpose of spying on his older sisters.
Louis ( Matt Ross ) is the naive and impressionable office associate of Patrick Bateman who looks up to him as an admirable role model deserving of emulation but still hides in the closet for the purpose of keeping his homosexuality a secret.
6. Ellen ( Sandra Kerns ) is the sensible mother of the Powell family who employs Charles as a substitute father and big brother to care for her young kids because her loving husband is stationed overseas as the naval commander of a nuclear-powered aircraft carrier. She gradually fades away when her character spends more and more time with her military spouse abroad.
Courtney ( Samantha Mathis ) is the secret mistress of Patrick Bateman who takes him as a substitute lover because her official fiancee Louis is obviously gay. She gradually fades away when her character spends more and more time becoming numbingly drunk and drugged out of her mind.
7. Anthony ( Justin Whalin ) is the cute and streetwise little cousin who intentionally annoys Charles a lot but then vanishes mysteriously after several episodes of the program’s fourth season.
Paul Allen ( Jared Leto ) is the charming, smooth and letter-perfect office co-worker who intentionally annoys Patrick Bateman a lot but then vanishes mysteriously after his enraged rival kills him with an axe in his apartment.
8. Gwendolyn ( Jennifer Runyon ) is the beautiful sexy coed who becomes the steady girlfriend of Charles during the program’s first season until they decide to break off their romantic engagement in the two-part episode ”Twice Upon A Time”.
Christie ( Cara Seymour ) is the unlucky street hooker who becomes the favorite prostitute of Patrick Bateman and lives to regret it especially when he goes after her with a chainsaw and divides her body into two parts.
9. Charles tries to uncover the hidden truth locked inside his own subconscious brain that provides the key answer for resolving the Powell family’s grave dilemna about saving their house in the episode ”Dutiful Dreamer” wherein he meets with the quirky imaginary characters of his nocturnal dream realm as Don Charlso, a jocular parody of Vito Corleone played by Marlon Brando in the venerated crime saga “The Godfather”.
Patrick Bateman tries to hide the ugly truth about his serial killer occupation by falsely excusing himself from answering more questions during Police Detective Kimball’s judicious interrogation so that he can attend a bogus meeting with a fictional gentleman named Cliff Huxtable, a sly reference to the lead character played by Bill Cosby in the vanguard 1980s family sitcom “The Cosby Show”.
10. Charles experiences a surprising turn-of-events when he and Buddy gladly return to the Pembroke home after their vacation junket, only to learn unexpectedly that a new and completely different family, the Powells, had already bought the house and quickly moved in without their prior knowledge during the start of the show’s second season.
Patrick Bateman experiences a shocking twist-of-events when he gradually returns to Paul Allen’s apartment suite after committing numerous violent murders there, only to discover unexpectedly that a mysterious female real estate agent is showing off the newly-painted empty residential unit to her clients where the multiple dead bodies are completely gone without a trace, leaving the possibility that he may have just dreamt it all in the film’s quizzical ending.
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by Ellen Robena Field
One cold morning, Maurice awoke from his dreams, sat up in bed and listened. He thought he heard a knock at his window; but though the moon was shining brightly, Jack Frost had been so busily at work that Maurice could not see through the thickly painted panes. So he crept sleepily out of bed, opened the window and whispered, “Who is there?”
“I am,” replied a tinkling voice. “I am the little New Year, ho! ho! And I’ve promised to bring a blessing to everyone. But I am such a little fellow. I need somebody to help me distribute them. Won’t you please come out and help?”
“Oh, it’s so cold!” said Maurice. “I’d rather go back to my warm bed.” And he shivered as Jack Frost, who was passing, tickled him under the chin with one of the frosty paint brushes.
“Never mind the cold,” urged the New Year. “Please help me.”
So Maurice hurried into his clothes and was soon out in the yard. There he found a rosy-cheeked boy a little smaller than himself, pulling a large cart which seemed to be loaded with good things. On one side of this cart was painted the word “LOVE” and on the other “KINDNESS”.
As soon as the New Year saw Maurice, he said, “Now please take hold and help me pull.” Down the driveway and up the hill they traveled until they came to an old shanty.
“Here is where I make my first call,” said the New Year. Maurice looked wonderingly at him. “Why, nobody lives here but an old man who works for us. And he hasn’t any children.”
“He needs my help,” said the New Year. “For grown people like to be thought of just as much as children do. You shovel out a path to his door while I unload some of my blessings.”
And the little hands went busily at work, piling up warm clothing, wood and a new year’s dinner, the New Year singing as he worked: “Oh, I am the little New Year; ho! ho! Here I come tripping it over the snow. Shaking my bells with a merry din. So open your door and let me in!”
Old Joe, hearing some noise outside, came to the door. And when he saw all the nice gifts, tears ran down his cheeks for gladness. And as he carried them into the house, he whispered, “The dear Lord has been here tonight.”
“Where are we going now?” asked Maurice as they ran down the hill.
“To take some flowers to a poor sick girl,” answered the New Year.
Soon they came to a small white house where the New Year stopped. “Why, Bessie our sewing girl lives here,” said Maurice. “I did not know she was sick.”
“See,” said the New Year, “this window is open a little. Let us throw this bunch of pinks into the room. They will please her when she wakes and will make her happy for several days.”
Then they hurried to other places, leaving some more blessings behind them.
“What a wonderful cart you have,” said Maurice. “Though you have taken so much out, it never seems to get empty.”
“You are right, Maurice. There is never any end to love and kindness. As long as I find people to love and be kind to, my cart is full of blessings for them. And it will never grow empty until I can no longer find people to help. If you will go with me every day and help me scatter my blessings, you will see how happy you will be all the year long.”
“A happy New Year!” called someone. And Maurice found himself in bed with his sister standing in the doorway smiling at him.
“Have you had a pleasant dream, dear?” she asked.
“Why, where is the little New Year?” said Maurice. “He was just here with me.”
“Come into Mamma’s room and see what he has brought you,” answered his sister.
There in the snowy white cradle he found a tiny baby brother, the gift of the New Year.
How happy Maurice was then! But he did not forget his dream. Old Joe and Bessie had their gifts, too. And Maurice tried so hard to be helpful that he made all his friends glad because the happy New Year had come.
( Buttercup Gold and Other Stories, Bangor : C. H. Glass, 1894 )
ALWAYS KEEP WATCHING SCOTT BAIO IN HIS NEW HIT NICK-AT-NITE FAMILY SITCOM ON NICKELODEON !
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1. Each can nostalgically look back upon his kaleidoscopic showbiz childhood which fortuitously included a joyfully rare opportunity to hang around, observe and be surrounded by glamorous venuses during their quartered private moments.
SCOTT BAIO initially worked for series creator Gary Marshall prior to “Happy Days” on the quickly-cancelled sitcom BLANSKY’S BEAUTIES wherein he became perfectly cast as a horny little adolescent who’s determinedly trying to impress a jazzy group of Las Vegas showgirls under his energetic aunt’s supervision but much to his youthful chagrin, the beautiful vixens never regarded him seriously and kept playfully treating him like a baby brother. He continued to be around other Las Vegas showgirls in his next series WHO’S WATCHING THE KIDS?
CHRISTIAN BALE once divulged an interestingly racy tidbit beguilingly pulled from the guarded memory vault of his unconventional early years during a celebrity interview for the March 1997 issue of MOVIELINE magazine: “Well, my mother worked in the circus. She was a clown and a dancer. She rode the elephants. She was the lady in the sequins who introduced the trapeze act. There were incredibly beautiful women walking around all the time. There I was in the caravans, a seven year old boy ogling all these incredible women walking around in front of me.”
2. Each began as a gifted child star who portrayed a lost urchin tragically separated from his parents due to a major crisis.
SCOTT BAIO as Julius in the Emmy nominated LUKE WAS THERE.
CHRISTIAN BALE as Jim in the Oscar nominated EMPIRE OF THE SUN.
3. Each played the starring role in a cult movie musical with a talented ensemble of children.
SCOTT BAIO as Bugsy Malone in BUGSY MALONE.
CHRISTIAN BALE as Jack Kelly in NEWSIES.
4. Each served as the cute and charming love interest of the lead female character in a girl-bonding cult motion picture.
SCOTT BAIO as Brad co-starred with Jodie Foster in FOXES.
CHRISTIAN BALE as Laurie co-starred with Winona Ryder in LITTLE WOMEN.
5. Each participated as the central hero’s best friend in a bizarre yet entertaining dance flick.
SCOTT BAIO co-starred with Greg Bradford in SKATETOWN, U.S.A.
CHRISTIAN BALE co-starred with Robert Sean Leonard in SWING KIDS.
6. Each acted in a fantasy sex comedy replete with various paranormal or supernatural elements.
SCOTT BAIO in the telekinetic ZAPPED!
CHRISTIAN BALE in the fairy magical A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S DREAM.
SPECIAL BAIO / BALE ADDEDUM I : Their Baby Girls
“It’s just like that great Rolling Stones song. You don’t get what you want. You get what you need. I needed to have a girl. It may be cosmic payback a little bit but it needed to happen. Today, I can’t imagine not seeing my daughter everyday. The only word I have to describe her is delicious.”
( SCOTT BAIO talking about his daughter Bailey )
“I have to admit I’m a little bit of a turbulence addict because of growing up with it so much. What makes me more nervous than anything is knowing exactly what’s gonna happen. But I have my periods when I do worry about stability, though, especially as a father. There’s something about being prepared to kill to stop any kind of tears coming across your kid’s face.”
( CHRISTIAN BALE talking about his daughter Emme )
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7. Each was the juvenile mascot in a glorious saga focusing upon a charismatic and dynamic leader whose notable entourage of trusted comrades included a rotund and venerable key adviser who also has a close personal relationship with the young boy.
SCOTT BAIO was and will always be fondly remembered as Chachi Arcola on the immortal classic sitcom HAPPY DAYS wherein the most popular figure turned out to be Emmy nominee Henry Winkler’s hip leather-jacketed motorcyclist Arthur “The Fonz” Fonzarelli whose gang of friends also included Al Molinaro as Big Al Delvecchio who gave Chachi a job at Arnold’s diner and later married his widowed mother.
CHRISTIAN BALE was in the critically acclaimed Shakespearian epic HENRY V starring Oscar nominee Kenneth Branagh who played the title role supported by an eminent cast of thespians which included Robbie Coltrane as the tragic Falstaff whom the young lad directly served.
8. Each starred as an appealing modern hero whose vagabond best friend disrupts his peacefully organized bourgeois lifestyle in connection to his quotidian responsibilities within a utopian family setting, generally influenced by his close ties with a knowing and nurturing female character. Both also suffered the painful loss of an early first love.
SCOTT BAIO‘s other famous television sitcom role was CHARLES-IN-CHARGE, a college student whose irresponsible best friend Buddy ( Willie Aames ) often hampered his paid employment as a male nanny for the rambunctious kids of two different middle-class families ( The Pembrokes and The Powells ), a job complicated further by the good-natured meddling of his vivacious widowed mother Lillian ( Ellen Travolta ) who permanently moved into the neighborhood after Charles quarreled and broke up with his original girlfriend Gwendolyn ( Jennifer Runyon ).
CHRISTIAN BALE acted in METROLAND as Chris Lloyd, a rising ad executive whose nomadic best friend Tony ( Leo Ross ) pays a visit and jealously makes him question his own comfortable domestic life in suburbia as well as his genuinely happy marriage to keenly perceptive wife Marion ( Emily Watson ) ultimately resurrecting dormant memories of Anouk ( Elsa Zylberstein ), a sexy Parisian girlfriend from his youth.
9. Each depicted an adventurous rookie or neophyte who helps an older and distinguished award-winning veteran star in his mentoring character’s bold quest to answer unsolved riddles or mysteries.
SCOTT BAIO was an energetic intern who aided multiple Emmy winner Dick Van Dyke to unmask the real killers behind puzzling medical deaths in the television series DIAGNOSIS : MURDER.
CHRISTIAN BALE was a resourceful cabin boy who assisted legendary Oscar awardee Charlton Heston to search for hidden pirate’s gold in the television film remake of the classic TREASURE ISLAND.
10. Each participated in a television murder mystery starring a quick-witted and knowledgeable hero from popular literature who is requested by an old comrade to judicially investigate the suspicious death of an unpleasant virago fatally engaged in noxious gossip and blackmail against others.
SCOTT BAIO served as Assistant District Attorney Peter Whelan, a knavish young justice barrister who locks horns with famed defense counsel Perry Mason ( Raymond Burr ), the legendary creation of mystery author Erle Stanley Gardner, during the sensational trial of Perry’s longtime friend Lauren Jeffreys ( Diana Muldaur ), the guilt-ridden prime suspect charged with the murder of her nemesis Dyan Draper ( Valerie Harper ), a viperous fashion magazine queen who used her influential editorial columns to ruin careers and lives in PERRY MASON : THE CASE OF THE FATAL FASHION.
CHRISTIAN BALE undertook the role of Timothy Perkins, a mysterious student at Carne boys school where spymaster George Smiley ( Denholm Elliott ), the quietly intriguing protagonist of John Le Carre’s espionage novels, is visiting a former intelligence colleague Ailsa Brimley ( Glenda Jackson ) as part of his investigation looking into the gruesome killing of Stella Rode ( Joanna Jacobs ), a meddlesome teacher’s spouse who relished finding out about people’s hidden secrets and paid a deadly price for her snooping in A MURDER OF QUALITY.
11. Each became part of a zany and strange musical kingdom where the various chimerical inhabitants always dressed in highly outlandish garments and lived their nocturnal existences under the dominant reign of two feuding headstrong and jealous supreme queens.
SCOTT BAIO was Pat The Pig, one of the highly unusual fantasy characters and creatures met by an inquisitive young girl as she journeys through numerous dreamlike adventures within a magical realm where the volatile Red Queen ( Ann Jillian ) is locked in a knockdown battle for supremacy against the enigmatic White Queen ( Carol Channing ) in famed producer Irwin Allen’s all-star cast television version of Lewis Carroll’s classic ALICE IN WONDERLAND.
CHRISTIAN BALE portrayed Arthur Stuart, a journalist assigned to write a story on the flamboyant excesses of the British glamrock period during the 1970s, which revives his own quixotic memories as a naive young fan of vanished bisexual superstar Brian Slade ( Jonathan Rhys Meyers ) who got involved in a kinky and scandalous public homosexual relationship with self-destructive gay cult idol Curt Wild ( Ewan McGregor ), said tempestuous union eventually leading to a tragic downward spiral for both in THE VELVET GOLDMINE.
12. Each also participated in a European financed special effects laden juvenile fantasy movie regarding a unique kid messiah and his courageous friends who get together on a quixotic adventure to battle and defeat a villainous warrior-wizard who is threatening and hurting numerous other youngsters.
SCOTT BAIO co-starred with Jon Voight in the family film sequel SUPERBABIES : BABY GENIUSES 2 where the main hero is the legendary urchin Kahuna who embarks on a thrill-packed mission to rescue other jeopardized infants from powerful media mogul Biscane’s diabolical plot to brainwash every child in the world through coded TV broadcasts of mind-controlling messages via his state-of-the-art satellite system and high tech communications center.
CHRISTIAN BALE was featured in the Swedish fantasy epic THE LAND OF FARAWAY about a lonely orphan named Bosse who is spirited away from his unhappy existence and whisked off to a joyful magical domain of flying winged horses where his real father is the king but he still must earn his royal inheritance as Prince Mio by going on a noble quest to vanquish the evil knight Kato who has imprisoned and enslaved many children of the realm.
SPECIAL BAIO / BALE ADDENDUM II : Daddies and Daughters
“Look Daddy! That’s THE BATMAN! Let us do battle with him as his newest archvillain super team. I’ll be the glamorous BABY DOLL. And you can be the evil genius DR. HUGO STRANGE.”
“Look Daddy! It’s the Daddy of THE SUPERBABIES! He also has a TV show on Nickelodeon - SEE DAD RUN. If you had a TV show like him, would they call it SEE DAD RANT? Anyway, Nick-at-Nite is no place for The Dark Knight. And you’re much too beatnik for Brit Nick.”
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13. Each garnered accolades for bravely portraying a vulnerable and troubled male whose deep-seated private insecurities contribute to his languishing physical and mental health that results in a negatively jaundiced state of consciousness which tragically causes harmful injury to others, unleashing queasy emotions of knife-like personal guilt.
SCOTT BAIO captured his first Emmy nomination, plus a Youth In Film Trophy as Best Young Actor In A Television Special, for his moving portrayal of Jack Melon, a gangling teenage high school kid ignored by his father and overshadowed by his elder sibling, who foolishly deals with his social awkwardness and inferiority complex through habitual marijuana smoking, a worsening drug vice that ultimately proves almost fatal during a rowboat accident which sends his brother to the hospital and jeopardizes the latter’s athletic qualifications in STONED.
CHRISTIAN BALE received a Best Actor Prize from the Catalonian International Film Festival, plus a heavy dose of criticism and controversy, for his shocking role as Trevor Reznick, a gruesomely emaciated factory worker suffering from chronic insomnia and overwhelming weight loss, who unfortunately gets distracted on the job and becomes responsible for a mechanical accident which injures a fellow co-worker, thereafter falling into a nightmarish quagmire of paranoia and suspicion about bizarre events within his life that offer vital clues to solving the Kafkaesque mystery of what is really haunting him in THE MACHINIST.
14. Each portrayed an ambitious individual whose rigorous dedication to swimming and other water sports becomes a quintessential element of his characterization within a modern narrative about human weaknesses in the face of unhealthy addictions or libertine temptations which ominously endanger personal goals of victory, joy and fulfillment.
SCOTT BAIO garnered his second Emmy nomination for ALL THE KIDS DO IT as Buddy, a promising champion high diver whose risky enjoyment of long drinking binges with friends exposes him to the social effects of intense peer pressure that makes him become a secret alcoholic and results in a jolting calamity which might unfortunately kill his Olympic visionquest.
CHRISTIAN BALE starred in LAUREL CANYON as Sam, a recently graduated psychiatrist whose very disciplined nature is manifested by his daily exercise routine of swimming numerous laps in the pool of his L.A. family quarters, where his estranged bohemian mother Jane and her younger lover Ian seduce his repressed fiancee Alex with their hedonistic lifestyle of drugs and rock music, consequently unraveling her son’s jerrybuilt engagement already threatened by his growing attraction to a kind-hearted female medical intern.
15. Each depicted a grievously handicapped but tenaciously nonconformist young man who unexpectedly fulfills a valuable key role in positively changing and improving the socially quarantined life of another jinxed outcast.
SCOTT BAIO assumed the part of Johnny Jay, a keenly enterprising wheelchair-bound delinquent recruited by Sue Jenkins ( Dee Wallace ), a concerned high school teacher, to help Samantha Anderson ( Toni Kalem ), a young lame girl who had been the victim of a crippling accident, for her quest to master this physical handicap and to overcome intensely bitter frustrations about her new situation in RUN DON’T WALK.
CHRISTIAN BALE played Bobby Platt, a gentle brain-damaged orphan whose loving mother’s untimely death compels him to escape from his treacherous stepfather Bernard De Winter ( Daniel Benzali ) and to find quiet sanctuary with an idiosyncratic hermit named Mr. Summers ( John Hurt ) who judiciously devotes himself to burying the remains of poor forest creatures killed by vehicular mishaps in ALL THE LITTLE ANIMALS.
16. Each played an impetuous young suitor whose quixotic courtship of the rich girl he loves is being negatively undermined and obstructed by her domineering and judgmental father, a patriarchal autocrat effectively portrayed by a venerable master thespian of stage and screen.
SCOTT BAIO was Mario Cotone, a struggling yet talented photographer from Little Italy who becomes enraptured with debutante queen Nicole ( Kelly Van der Velden ), the cherished offspring of John Robertson Yeats ( Christopher Plummer ), a very narcissistic and temperamental famous actor starring in a hit Broadway musical who jealously disapproves of their kindled romance and undertakes to separate the lovers in I LOVE N.Y.
CHRISTIAN BALE was Edmund Rosier, a foppish and doting collector of antiques and bibelots who falls in love with Pansy ( Valentina Cervi ), the innocent and kind daughter of Gilbert Osmond ( John Malkovich ), a sinister and ghoulish dilettante expatriate who bars her from seeing the young man while also trapping Isabel Archer ( Nicole Kidman ), a newly prosperous vacationing heiress, into an unhappy marriage in PORTRAIT OF A LADY.
17. Each acted in a suspense thriller wherein his jeopardized character maintains a close relationship with a blonde female prior to getting himself tragically killed by an explosive device while the movie’s queasiest scene-stealing performance belongs to a veteran actor’s nightmarish embodiment of an unredeemable human monster.
SCOTT BAIO starred in DETONATOR as Zack, a former Green Beret explosives specialist-turned-professional assassin whose last hit job courtesy of kittenish recruiter Gail ( Charlene Tilton ) obliged him to provide sanctuary for injured teenager Jaime ( Shannon Bruce ) who possesses evidence incriminating murderously psychotic and grotesquely disfigured corrupt cop Whip ( Don Stroud ), a nasty quagmire of a situation that ultimately leads to a fiercely and fatally brutal endgame pitting hero against villain.
CHRISTIAN BALE appeared in THE SECRET AGENT as Stevie, the mentally-disabled younger sibling of Winnie ( Patricia Arquette ), a naive girl married to jaded undercover operative Verloc ( Bob Hoskins ) who inadvertently causes the poor kid’s lamentable death by assigning him to quickly transport a package containing a bomb, the vile handiwork of The Professor ( Robin Williams listed as George Spelvin ), a frighteningly rabid and zealous detonations expert.
18. Each gave a memorable performance as a talented athlete whose encouraging sports career has been tragically undermined by his own volatile substance abuse problems and whose difficult journey towards personal healing necessarily involves a key relationship with his loyal brother or best friend.
SCOTT BAIO undertook the challenging role of Buff Saunders, a young hockey player who starts to mimic his embittered father’s dependence upon liquor and finds himself on the grim path towards becoming a teen alcoholic, if not for the kind intervention of his best friend Billy ( Lance Kerwin ) who earnestly vows to rescue Buff from his self-destructive ways in THE BOY WHO DRANK TOO MUCH.
CHRISTIAN BALE won an Academy Award for his magnificent portrayal of Dicky Ekland, a quick-tempered yet gifted boxer who tragically sinks into a nightmare of crack addiction, violence and jail but discovers ultimate redemption after parole by intensively training his feisty kid brother Mickey “Irish” Ward ( Mark Wahlberg ) for The Wold Light Welterweight Championship in THE FIGHTER.
SPECIAL BAIO / BALE ADDENDUM III : Cartoon Portraits
SCOTT BAIO – The Bruce Wayne of Celebreality TV
CHRISTIAN BALE – The Welsh Chachi of Cult Movies
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19. Each garnered nearly unanimous positive reviews and critical acclaim for his dramatic role as a mergers and acquisitions executive bureaucrat with another secret double life in an independent movie project helmed by women filmmakers. Both motion pictures were theatrically released around the start of the new millennium and constitute significant turning points in each of their respective acting careers.
SCOTT BAIO received three Best Actor Prizes from The Atlantic City Film Festival, The Kansas City Halfway To Hollywood Film Festival, and The San Diego Film Festival for his moving portrayal of industrious baker and corporate raider Dominic Pyzola in THE BREAD, MY SWEET ( a.k.a. A WEDDING FOR BELLA ) directed by Melissa Martin and produced by Adrienne Wehr.
CHRISTIAN BALE earned the Chlotrudis Award and was nominated as Best Actor by The Online Film Critics Society, The London Critics Circle Film Awards, and The U.K. Empire Awards for his malevolent performance as investment banker and serial killer Patrick Bateman in AMERICAN PSYCHO directed by Mary Harron who also co-wrote the screenplay with Guinevere Turner.
20. Each portrayed the arrogantly quarrelsome young scion of a powerful urban family whose grave act of thuggish conduct directly involving a waitress hired at a public eatery becomes the nuclear catalyst which triggers a jumble of violent occurrences that eventually leads to the bloody downfalls of several rogues, knaves and malefactors.
SCOTT BAIO enacted the vital role of Paulie Minetti, the impetuous jackanapes son of mellowed Italian crime patriarch Gino Minetti ( Ben Gazzara ), who unwittingly instigates a nefarious knockdown gang war between two quarreling syndicate families by angrily refusing to tip a hostile waitress ( Leigh Allen-Baker ) at a diner for serving his crew a lousy meal despite the fact that she is also the daughter of Irish mob boss Paddy Mulroney ( Charles Durning ) in VERY MEAN MEN.
CHRISTIAN BALE played Walter Wade Jr., the sociopathic heir of a New York construction tycoon, who murders an innocent black college student in front of a restaurant just when one of the waitresses ( Toni Collette ) happened to be enjoying a smoke break, consequently igniting a deadly race to secure or stop this vulnerable quarry’s key testimony between Wade’s animalistic underworld goons and a streetsmart police detective ( Samuel L. Jackson ) who’s also the nephew of the legendary private eye in the remake of SHAFT.
21. Each depicted a loyal and noble son who conspires to set things right in his own family tragically burdened with grievous kinship issues revolving around masculine jealousies, quarrels and estrangements, his veiled mission having been originally triggered by the untimely demise of the clan’s influential patriarch.
SCOTT BAIO delineated the main character of Richie, the affable ringleader within his large Italian-American family, who quietly persuades two cousins, the wise-cracking Phil ( Thomas Calabro ) and the negativity-obsessed Al ( Carlo Imperato ) to kidnap their uncommunicative and emotionally distant fathers ( Dean Stockwell, Alex Rocco and Joe Viterelli ) for a surprise weekend camping jubilee of necessary male bonding after the sad death of their venerable grandfather in ITALIAN TIES ( a.k.a. FACE TO FACE ).
CHRISTIAN BALE demonstrated his impressive thespic range as Amled, a 16th century Danish prince who feigns madness in order to secretly plot vengeance against his envious uncle Fenge ( Gabriel Byrne ), the guilty murderer of his slain father, the kingdom’s legitimate ruler, and the new husband of his widowed mother Queen Geruth ( Helen Mirren ) in ROYAL DECEIT ( a.k.a. PRINCE OF JUTLAND ), taken from an ancient historical saga upon which the great William Shakespeare based his famous play “Hamlet”.
22. Each served as a police-trained hero who gradually discovers a lethal conspiracy involving a powerful figure and becomes acquainted with a tragic female outlaw who is ultimately punished for helping the protagonist gain vital knowledge necessary in his dangerous mission to answer relevant questions unlocking the mystery, which eventually climaxes towards a jarring surprise plot twist.
SCOTT BAIO played Barry Rengler in FACE VALUE, a disgraced police academy graduate who visits his childhood friend and expelled fellow classmate Tim Gates ( James Wilder ) who moved away to become a ruthless investment banker, enjoying the quasi-criminal spoils of his ill-gotten wealth and the high life on the urban nightclub party scene together with his sexy jezebel Syd Deshaye ( Krista Allen ) who makes the fatal error of romancing their handsome guest especially after he is compelled to investigate further her knavish rich boyfriend’s mysterious death when his luxury yacht suddenly explodes, leaving no survivors.
CHRISTIAN BALE portrayed John Preston in EQUILIBRIUM, a high-ranking Grammaton Cleric Enforcer of Libria, a futuristic dystopia ruled by an omnipotent tyrant named Father where all emotional content ( EC-10 ) is deemed subversive. He accidentally misses taking his regular dosage of Proscium, an emotion-quelling drug, and begins to experience genuine human feelings which motivate him to challenge the oppressive status quo and join the resistance movement known as The Underground. Preston is assigned to interrogate Mary O’Brien ( Emily Watson ), a female revolutionary arrested for being a sense offender who develops a sympathetic kinship with the conflicted officer before she is mercilessly executed by state authorities. Her poignant martyrdom finally compels the hero to launch an open rebellion against the totalitarian government protected by Vice-Consul DuPont ( Angus MacFayden ) who is also the vanguard and keeper of Libria’s ultimate secret.
23. Each starred in a kinetic crime drama as a murderously ruthless hoodlum aspiring for legitimacy who tries to corrupt a younger innocent friend and mislead him down a negative journey towards self-destruction, while being engaged in open conflict with a strong female professional and endangering the life of another woman character loved by him, ultimately resulting in his own tragic downfall amidst a violent climactic gun battle.
SCOTT BAIO portrayed the juicy role of Frank Chase in FINISH LINE, a notorious and cunning international arms dealer masquerading as a quasi-philanthropic millionaire importer who shrewdly hires Mitch ( Samuel Page ), a destitute yet ambitious stock race car driver as his mechanic, playfully tempting his naive employee with the dishonest gains of life in the fast lane while unscrupulously taking advantage of the young man’s keen automotive expertise for various illegal smuggling operations. After secretly witnessing his rich employer viciously kill a terrified quisling in cold blood, Mitch decides to cooperate with the federal authorities, particularly Agent Matthews ( Timilee Romolini ) who has been Chase’s legal nemesis for several years, trying unsuccessfully to apprehend this omnipotent modern gangster and bring him to justice. But the jinxed racer’s opposing loyalties are further strained to the breaking point by his clandestine nocturnal trysts with Frank’s gorgeous daughter Jessie ( Taylor Cole ) who is both a vulnerable pawn and a knowledgeable player in her father’s evil machinations. When the hero’s noble and upright father Joe ( Dan Lauria ) is kidnapped by the villain’s menacing goons, Mitch stages a daring rescue of his pop followed by a jarring action-packed car chase while government law enforcers quickly zero in at the airport where a turbulent fire fight injures Jessie and brings Frank Chase’s reign of criminality to a savage end.
CHRISTIAN BALE enacted the challenging role of Jim Davis in HARSH TIMES, a former street thug and petty criminal who returns home from the war to his old neighborhood as a volatile ex-Army Ranger seeking a job within the local police department. He reunites with his best friend Mike ( Freddy Rodriguez ) but unfortunately keeps discouraging his civilian buddy from pursuing his own goals toward self-improvement, much to the angry dismay of his more successful lawyer girlfriend Sylvia ( Eva Longoria ) who regards the nefarious combat soldier as a very bad influence on the man she loves. Jim’s worsening post-traumatic stress disorder also threatens the life of his adoring future bride Marta ( Tammy Trull ) who breaks up with him in order to protect their unborn baby. When a major drug transaction goes horribly wrong, Jim Davis is fatally shot by an elderly patriarch and finally dies from his severe wounds.
SPECIAL BAIO / BALE ADDENDUM IV : Harbingers Of Destiny
SCOTT BAIO as Charles-In-Charge covered in flour.
A blessed precursor to THE BREAD, MY SWEET ?
CHRISTIAN BALE as Patrick Bateman covered in blood.
A dire portent to THE AURORA TRAGEDY ?

















































































